Bobby Blake - Exclusive Interview

The Star who shines in the Realm of Porn is now shining in a new Kingdom. Bananation speaks to Bobby Blake about his porn career, God and his new book, My Life In Porn.

Bananation: You are an African-American gay video superstar. What made you retired from the industry 7 years ago at the height of your career?

Bobby Blake: I have always had the mentality that I would quit at the peak, and having made sixty films over 3 years, I felt I had taken Bobby Blake persona as far as it could go. I had express what I needed to, and shown what I needed to show. So I wanted to move on with my life and do other things

In your interview with Herndon Davis, you mentioned that "your relationship with God' is personal. What can you say to gay Christians who are struggling between faith and identity?

I don't tell people how they should reconcile their faith and their sexuality: that has to be between them and God. But what I do tell them is that they need to have a personal relationship with God. Don't allow what others say come between you and God.

In the same interview, you also said that God put you in gay porn for a reason. Being a preacher before rising to porn stardom, how do you balance between Gods' words and fucking men in front of camera?

I never said God put me in porn for a reason ..God never put me in porn ! I said things happen for a reason and I now understand now why I took the route I took. I don't try and wrong the right or right the wrong. For me being in porn has led to me being contacted by many men and women struggling with their sexuality. I have been able to help thousands of men and to get that feedback saying ..you help me be honest with self.

You entered the porn business after your visit to an adult bookstore at age 14 or 15. You said, "I want to try this one day". What are your advices to budding porn actors who want to bring their fantasies to life?

Porn is not easy to do. You need to be a very particular type of person to do it. You need to know who you are, and you need to know what you're prepared to do. Many people in the adult industry are damaged people who end up getting more damaged through their involvement with it - drugs and alcohol abuse are unfortunately common in porn. I had worked as an exotic dancer for years before I did films so I knew what was comfortable with and how I was prepared to be seen by others. I today push the fact go to school get a degree ..for the mind is powerful ..become your own boss..business owner.

Your book, My Life In Porn - The Bobby Blake Story will be out May, 2008. How do you handle the unhappy memories as you are writing the book?

The challenge was to be honest-because I wanted to explain how I came to be the man I am as fully as possible - but at the same time not hurt any of those near and dear to me . The tough times are what show you what your qualities are.

What lessons in life can readers expect to learn from your book?

To be true to yourself and honest with yourself. To conduct yourself in a way that you get respect..whatever your race or sexuality or your position in life. The need to have a strong relationship with God on a personal level. That life struggles can work for the good in your life if you process them in the right way. How to stand firm on your beliefs while in a relationship that challenges everything you stand for.

You do not favor gay marriages because ceremonies and rings are only symbolic to you. Instead, you value what is in the heart. Hmm, does that mean Bobby Blake is the man who looks beyond appearance, races, nationality and wealth in a partner?

Yes I have had lovers of all different races and nationalities and levels of income..most of all I value integrity,fitness and honesty. I look at the heart of the man or woman for what's in one heart is what he or she is all about. You have to stand for something and know what that something it..have goals in life and over a period of time some of those goals should be met.

You emphasized a lot about getting a good education in your interview with Herdon Davis. You have a degree in Business and correct me if I'm wrong, you are pursuing a degree in criminal justice. Tell us truly if the lacks of education has pushed people to do porn for quick bucks?

I am now working on a Master degree in criminal justice after done with it..I will moved on and work on a Dr-degree in criminal justice. There are a lot of people who are in the porn business who have degrees..they have just chose to take a different route. There is a lot of money in the porn business just have to know what you are doing and stand for something in doing what you do.

Can you imagine working in a 9-to-5 office job with shirt and tie if you have not entered adult entertainment industry?

Yes I have work a 9-5 and still do ...just do a lot of my work from home..when done with all the schooling I want to teach on a college level in the field of criminal justice. I am no different from anyone else I can do what ever it takes to make my life a happy one.

Like Colton Ford who has released a CD, you will be releasing a single, 'Bootie Aint' Got no Face.". Tell us what this song is about.

Gay New York rapper Trudog invited me to do a guest rap on his single..My first time in the studio was kind of nerve-wracking, but Trudog put me at my ease and I was proud of the result

Now that you are back to ministry services, I'm sure that many in the Church recognise you. With your porn career history, do you have any indecent proposal from men/woman while at the Church?

I have people trying to come on to me both men and women but I quickly put them in their place. I don't play in God house . There is a place and time for all things and the house of God is not a place for such. I enjoy my walk with God it has allow me to reach out to thousands who wanted to die and not live but today ..they love themselves and one has to love self before he can love anyone else.

Have you been to Singapore?

I have never been to Singapore.

How much do you know about the gay scene here?

I knew that gay sex was illegal there.

Gay porn superstars are returning to their faith, like Tom Katt and yourself. Do you foresee more big names going back to the arms of God?

I am sure some will rediscover or reaffirm their faith. My Faith never left me it was always there ..just waiting on me to return to home base. Its is because of my faith I am able to stand now ..and reach out to millions all over this world.

To learn more about Bobby and his new book, visit http://www.bobbyblake.net/

The Dame of the Parliament - Eunice Olsen

Eunice Olsen

When I received this eMailer, I was seduced more by the model than the phone. She took center stage of the advertisement. Instinctively, I see her first than the phone in term of prominence. Is this a marketing flop then? I don't think so. She is as chic as the new MotoroRazer V8 luxury edition looks. Her sultry glance tempted me like the sinister snake in the Garden of Eden. In fact, too intimidating for a gay man to bear. If you ogle, I mean admire at the advertisment longer, you could probably see some resemblances in her to Thai pop diva, Tata Young and Hollywood starlet, Angelina Jolie.

To my overseas readers, you probably think that she is just another celebrity in Singapore. In a way, she is. She is a model, actress, TV host and a musician. But she is more. Eunice Olsen, as grandiose as her name sounds to her portfolio, is also a non-elected Member of Parliament (NMP) of the Republic of Singapore. If you google her, she wears many faces in public: the plain jane next door, the NMP in power suit and the glamourous girl in the limelight.

I have never followed her news since her foray into public attention after bagging the title of Miss Singapore Universe in 2000. Over the years, she has used her fame for good cause to promote volunteerism and humanitarian works. Is she an opportunist? Sure she is. But that's how I perceive a modern woman to be. She not only colorizes her life with her resume, she only injects some refreshing vibes to our Parliament. Way to go, girl!

To Sydney with Love Fund

This is going to look silly to many but it is a hope to me.

I'm just a guy, standing in front of a man, asking him to love him. A simple request but it never came through for the past seven years. My three-year long distance love with an American ended this year. I suggested that I moved to the U.S. twice but he never embraced the idea.

Separation does not help in building relationship. I learned my lesson painfully. A sweet Australian man entered my life recently. With his consent, I will be flying over to Sydney and to be with him for as long as I could.

This is not a holiday -it's about pursuing a chance to be loved or to love. I haven't found a job there yet. I'm sure he would help me in whatever he could but I would like to do my part.

"To Sydney with Love" Fund is an idea to help my transition in Sydney smoother while finding a job. I won't ask your support for nothing. Purchase a Christmas e-card at USD3.



Click on card to enlarge. To send the ecard, simply right click, save as .jpg, and attach to your email.

If you wish to pay through PayPal via email, simply send your email address to luvwinsall@hotmail.com and an invoice will be generated for your payment. You will receive an email from me. Click the link on the email to make your payment.

If you do not wish to buy a customised e-card from me, I welcome you to send the e-card to your friends. After all, Christmas is a season for sharing love.

Merry Christmas, Sydney

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Torn between Two Nations - My Love Story that inspires To Sydney with Love.

If you know of any job opportunity in Sydney, email me at luvwinsall@hotmail.com

Torn Between Two Nations - My Love Story.

Torn Between Two Nations - My Love Story


I am a GAM (Gay Asian Male) from Singapore who has fallen in love with a GWM (Gay White Male) from the United States.

I am 34 and he is 49. In spite of our significant age difference, our relationship is not what most people would perceive it to be. I truly love him just the way he is. There isn't a day that I have stopped loving him. It is a relationship that sustains the longest test of time, albeit a long distance love. I painted a beautiful picture of us watching the sunset together at Houston, Texas one day when we both grow old. I will be sitting close to his frail body and holding on to his arm. The tattoo on that arm - R.E.D, which is the acronym of his name will be as wrinkled and dull as his skin. But that day will never come. We broke up in September 2007. We didn't break up because we didn't love each other anymore. We didn't break up because of third party. We broke up because I am a Singaporean and he is an American. We broke up because of our difference in nationality. We broke up because of the distance between us we cannot bridge. The immigration law in our country owes us big time.

Singapore is a highly conservative country. Every gay man as far as Europe and the U.S. knows that there is no hope for homosexuals in Singapore. The recent repeal 377A campaign that failed speaks much of our legislation and our people.To my dismay, there is no hope for me either in the Land of Freedom. I blame myself for not finding out more about immigration law and the right of same sex marriage in the U.S. I only learned about them when my boyfriend told me that our relationship was not going to work becasue the United States neither allows their citizens to sponsor their same sex partners for immigration benefits nor recognizes same sex marriage for immigration purposes. Although there are other options to legalise my stay in the U.S., they ain't helpful to me. With a Diploma and a resume of an executive, no employer in the U.S. would sponsor me without a professional practice. Obtaining a student visa may be viable but education in the U.S. is expensive. Seeking asylum will not work because the Singapore Government does not prosecute gay relationship or gay as an individual. Winning diversity visa lottery is a one million chance that won't salvage my relationship. Out of desperation, I considered a fraudulent marriage with the opposite sex in exchange for my green card. But I gave the idea up. It will be a silly move. I might be able to stay in the U.S. but probably behind bar awaiting deportation. Regrettably, same-sex marriage is not even a way out. Under the Canadian options, my boyfriend and I may be granted permanent residency. In other word, he would have to choose between me or his family, friends and career in the U.S. I am prepared to give up mine but I do not expect the same from him. Love is unconditional: I want to be with him and I am prepared to sacrifice. But I have no chance at all.

For most of us - gays or lebsians - who have formed long distance relationships with Americans, same-sex marriage is our only hope to remain in the United States. Denying us the right that binational heterosexual married couples enjoyed is unjust. Marriage is a union of two persons who are ready to commit in a life-long partnership regardless of genders. If the right accorded to binational matrimony is recognised, why is it overlooked between binational homosexual married couples? Shouldn't marriage be based on love, and love is universal across races and nationalities? Just look at how Americans are helping the poor in the third-world countries. How about applying the same concept of compassion to binational same-sex couples before breaking us up? Where is the love? The Black Eyed Peas questioned that in the same titled song, 'Where is the Love' . If love between two persons is governed by religion, and religion in turn becomes a political tool for the Federal Government, then withholding the right of same-sex marriages is a decision made without any consideration of humanity. The U.S. Immigration law discriminates against same-sex union in defense of American traditional family values. Consider the Republicans who advocate such values but among them, there are hypocrites who engage in same-sex affairs. How right can these self-proclaimed moral police be justified in sealing the fates of binational homosexual couples? Banning same-sex partner of an American citizen from staying in the United States is an act of cruelty to human race. Tearing binational couples apart undermines our diplomatic understanding for the country.

Falling in love with a foreigner is more than about the person; it is also about knowing the country where we come from. The homepage of my IE browser is set to Yahoo! U.S. and not Yahoo! Singapore. The reason is obvious : I want to know what's happening in the U.S. I love my boyfriend and the country he lives in. I want to be attuned to the American way of life, hoping that one day I will be a part of it. I want to contribute to U.S. economy, of which, I can enjoy with my boyfriend and fellow American friends. Sadly, the Federal Government overlooks the economic value subsisting in same-sex marriages. Breaking up binational same-sex couples forces their very own people to leave the country, thus migrating their skills to competing countries. I wonder if the government has read about the pink economy identified by Richard Florida. Driving talents away from the United States is not driving up its GDP. The voices of the United States seem to say, "leave American gays alone. Go and date gays from the 16 nations that allow their citizens to sponsor their same sex partners for immigration benefits."

My 3-year long distance relationship was broken up because our future is bleak. He couldn't find a job in Singapore and neither could I find one in the United States. I admit that we haven't done enough to salvage our relationship but there is only so much we could do. If the same right enjoyed by straight binational married couples is extended to us, he would have already married me. My wound is still fresh as I am writing this.


Everyday, there are same-sex couples from various countries breaking up with their American partners because of the anti-gay immigration law. I found hope in Immigration Equality, a national organization that works to push the Uniting American Families Act (UAFA). I urge that the UAFA be passed on the ground of human rights. The torment of binational same-sex couples ought to end. Whether or not the UAFA becomes law, do not give up your American partner. True love never surrenders only if we try.

We shouldn't let policy dictates who we love. That's the responsbility of our heart.

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Men who behave intimately with Men but call themselves Straight. What's your Take?

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The Traffic Signal

A clear beacon of our increasingly motorized society is the humble traffic light or traffic control signal. It has spread across our cities silently but pervasively and now stands on most major roads that do not have the "freeway" classification (might be motorway or expressway in your jurisdiction and but anyway it is seldom free).

Let me tell you a little about traffic lights. Physically they are the visible part of a computer based system which has been pre-programmed to respond in particular ways to electronic signals received. As a road user we see the response as a red or green or other type of signal to which we are expected to act in a certain way. The programming is all done prior to you arriving at a traffic light intersection. This is the first and most important thing to understand. You can shout, tap your fingers, cuss or just feel high levels of frustration but these will not change the program; they may, however, relieve some tension and give you a sense of relief as you wait for the go command (or green light).

The signals received by the computer can be generated by a vehicle detection and/or monitoring device, by someone pushing a pedestrian button or maybe from a clock which triggers a set pattern of red/green/warning signals for a set period of the day. As a result of these signals, a pre-determined response will be triggered in the computer and the signals will reflect that response. There are many permutations but remember the computer has no eyes and hence it will always go through the particular sequences programmed. Typically if the light is to change then it will allow a clearance phase (usually an amber signal) before responding to the signal (from a motorist point of view it is a request) to change to a green signal. These onset of the clearance phases can be delayed in starting by such things as high priority roads (eg off ramps from Freeways), crossing times for pedestrians (based on an average or slower walking speed) or the linkage of computers operating at several intersections.

The computer system may control an isolated intersection, a series of intersections or an entire network and is programmed to maximize traffic efficiency without compromising safety. This programming is done by highly skilled persons to well established guidelines and in compliance with the prevailing traffic law. For instance it is poor programming to have a pedestrian crossing phase following the highest speed movement at the intersection because potentially there are more vehicles coming through the signals late and the drivers have less time to react because of the higher speed or clearance times are adjusted to match the approach speed, that is longer clearance times for higher speeds.

I provide this basic outline of a traffic signal to increase people’s understanding as a means of reducing the visible frustration and annoyance seen at traffic signals. There are some basic things to remember at traffic signals:

1. They cannot see and hence no finger signs or waving of fists has any effect on how long you wait. For instance the computer does not know that the vehicle who was detected approaching the signal on road A did in fact go through the red light and is no longer there so there will be a green light response for that vehicle.
2. The signals received are recorded and entered into the system for analysis against pre-programmed responses. Creeping over the white line does not get you a quicker green light only angry looks from pedestrians as you steal their space. In fact the detectors that identify to the system a vehicle has arrived are usually set back from the white line.
3. The red light camera does not lie. The detection equipment for these cameras is located usually 1metre or more past the white line.
4. Pedestrian and cyclists do have to obey the signals given. Real life observations may cause you to doubt it but it is the law.

So when you are next stopped at a traffic signal just accept that this a computer generated response to information received and while the information maybe faulty the computer is just responding in a pre-programmed manner. So relax and enjoy the beautiful things the world has to offer and arrive at your destination not only safely but feeling great.

Contributed by maipenrai, Sydney

Also by maipenrai:

• Expectations Fuel Disappointment

Does Age has a part to play in True Love?

Most people are sceptical towards young people dating old folks.

I used to form a smiliar skepticism. I was cynical when hot babes proclaiming true love to men decades older than them. Likewise from a gay's perspective, I couldn't see how an Adonis could fancy an old man. Now, I am part of the skepticism that others imposed on me.

In a relationship of which a partner is significantly older than the other, the older chap is coined as the suger daddy and the young sucker is lambasted as gold digger. This is so because the distribution of wealth is always imbalance in such a combination. Unless you are Larry Page and she is Britney Spears, an older partner will accumulae more wealth than his/her younger lover by the law of nature. I don't mean a millionaire and an average income earner. This sounds more like a modern day Cinderalla story. How many of us date a millionaire anyway? But financial dependence will always be perceived to fall on the older lover. Compare a 30-year old guy and his high school sweetheart. Bingo! I don't think I need to elaborate my point further.

Take a look at these couples. What's your first impression about their younger partners.

Rupert Murdoch, 70 & Wendi Deng Murdoch, 39
Age difference: 31

James Howard Marshall II, 89 & Anna Nicole Smith, 26 (Their age as of the year of dating before death)
Age difference : 63



Elton John, 60 & Partner, David Furnish, 45
Age Difference: 15



Demi Moore, 45 & Ashton Kutcher, 29
Age difference: 16

Britney Spears, 26 & Kevin Federline, 29
Age Difference: 3

There are gold diggers in every country. Suckers are prepared to trade in their youth and body for money and power. I don't mean to be disrespectful to the dead, but Anna Nicole Smith's court battle over James Howard Marshall II's will after his death speaks unmistakably of her motive marrying a man 63 years her senior. When it comes to money talk, partners from the less extraordinary league are usually under scrutiny. Everyone heard the cash ringing in Kevin Federline's register when the former backup dancer and singer married pop princess, Britney Spears. The Briteny-Kevin's case seems to be more than the case of compatibility in age, but also the ranking of wealth and social status. If young couples are not spared the judgement, how more difficult it is to believe that true love can exist when one partner is unreasonably old and ridiculously rich? Would Wendy Deng bear Rupert Murdock two kids if not for the inheritance that she would benefit from consummation of her marriage? Maybe yes, maybe not; only she knows. I am dating a 57-year old man now. Whether I like it or not, people are going to judge me when we are together. Likewise, I judge others when they have older partners. I firmly believe that my sweet Mr P can tell that I am not a heartbreaker.

When the age gap in a relationship gets wider, the issue of money, sex and level of understanding become a greater concern. I shall not repeat my views on money; conduct speaks for itself. Let's talk about sex then. A healthy loving relationship requires a healthy sexual relationship, but sex should not beget love and become a determinant for the success or failure of a relationship. There are other priorities in life which carry more substance than sex, such as building a loving relationship based on communications and other social activities. Unless we are dating an object, all humans are capable of showing affection through physical intimacy. But the frequency and intensity of the intimacy will very much depend on how high your sex drive is. If you are a horny pig, don't lie to yourself that your older partner would be able to sextify you. The truth is he ain't going to be your top-notch sex machine not without a little help of Viagra.

When you take away the money and sex issues, the subject of understanding is itself subjective. How much a young partner chooses to understand the world of his older partner very much depends on the individual. It is a lesson of life that does not come with formulas but simply acquired out of love.

It is disheartening to learn of young gay men calling older men unwanted. I defend strongly against that. Gay men who think in such shallow ways are blinded by young, tight bodies to even see beyond the fine layer of wonderful qualities that only come with age. Don't they put themselves in their shoes when they grow old? Do they want to feel unwanted or be given such label? Mind you, old men are not as lousy as others thought them to be. Don't think too highly of ourselves just because youth is on our side - don't forget that it is slipping by the days. OIder men have rich life experiences to share and mellow characters that display tender, love and care in the ways that younger men lack.

With Mr P, I feel that I am facing the calm blue sea on a breezy afternoon. His smiles are the sunshine that light up my day, and his stalwart presence is like a shelter under a big tree. If you think I am talking craps, wait till you meet an older man who sweeps your heart away.

Oh, money boys can forget about my preposition because older men are just various bank accounts to you.